Do you reach for the potato chips when you are bored? Turn to pizza when you are happy? Or down a bowl of ice cream when you are stressed? Emotional eating – eating in response to feelings as opposed to hunger – is one of the most common causes of weight gain. Everyday triggers include over-excitement; anger or resentment; boredom/anxiety; loneliness; and feeling numb.
Are you sick of your story?? Have you ever wanted to release your story? Ya know, that story you tell yourself and others over and over again. This is the story where you get to play the blame, shame, and victim game. It is the story of your past experiences, which you have allowed and unconsciously chosen to define your present and most likely future experiences.
Or maybe, like me, you tried to release your story, by going to traditional talk therapy and found that it helped to a point but after you got all your fancy titles and definitions of your dysfunction it never lead to increased joy and emotional freedom. “Could I have failed at therapy too?”
Traditional talk therapy never allowed me to get separate from the very thing that was keeping me miserable; my own ego programming.
Psychologists have proven that the average adult has between 50,000 and 75,000 thoughts per day and that by age thirty, 98% of your thoughts are the same fundamental thoughts repeated again and again. This is because by the age of five or six our ego defenses are already in place.
The language of feelings is the language you need to learn in order to begin to let go of your story and develop an intimate relationship with yourself. Cultivating an intimate relationship with yourself and your feelings is not only authentically gratifying and a way to release your story, it is the ONLY way to develop intimacy with your partner, your children, your food, your money, your business partners, family members, friends, and most importantly your own heart.
Learning how to communicate and process your feelings is a unique, mature, effective, and extremely Self-empowering way to process your life.
Processing your feelings leads to authentic happiness. Authentic happiness comes in two phases: First you have to connect to your own heart and then you have to have the courage to communicate from this place. Connect and live your own truth.
There are two ways to process life. Processing life through feelings and processing life through thinking. These two different ways of processing life are mutually exclusive! You cannot think and feel at the same time.
I am not saying that thinking is wrong. We all need to think about things, basically to plan and organize, but the question is how much do we need to think? And is thinking the ONLY way to solve a problem or resolve an issue? My answer is about 15% and no.
Even if your percentage is different, I can say with certainty that life is about balance. Obviously, when you are feeling stressed out and ungrounded, you are using your brain too much for your capacity. Therefore, this is a calling for balance.
It seems odd to think that you have to actually train yourself to feel, however, you do. The human condition is blessed with this protective mechanism called the Ego Mind, which does everything in its’ power to keep you from focusing on the feeling. Your Ego mind is what keeps you attached to your story. Staying attached to your story will never allow you to evolve past your issue or problem. Self-protection is the primary job of the Ego Mind.
Please do not misunderstand me; it is not that the story is not important; it is…it tells the story. However, is the story the whole story? What is also present in that story?
How about the energetic charge that is attached to that story. The feeling, the emotion, and the energy in motion, which is also present, but something your ego does not want you to feel.
What if you made room for the entire experience? What if you were authentically truthful about the entire experience? The story and the feeling are both present all the time. However, if you stay focused on the intellectual story, you will stay stuck, feel emotional liable, stressed out or exhausted, or worse, you will house the dis-ease in your body and create physical pain or ailments.
Wouldn’t it be great to be able to release that energy?
Thinking our way out of our feelings is like using oranges to make apple juice. It is just not going to happen.
How do I love me? Let me count the ways. More and more, today’s professionals are talking about the importance of loving yourself. That sounds great, but what good is it if you don’t understand what that really means, or how to do it for that matter.